Archive for yawn

It’s Curtains For Beyonce….

Posted in Beyonce Kowles, fashion, Funky Fashion Faux Pas, Movies, red carpet with tags , , , , , , , , , on April 28, 2009 by Kenya

Well, Beyonce’s subpar thriller “Obsessed” opened to the tune of 28 1/2 milli…well at least that’s what’s being told, I really wouldn’t put it past her “machine” to inflate numbers.  Anyway, I heard that she was as corpse like as ever.  I myself have no interest in seeing it because I’ve seen “Play Misty for Me” with Clint Eastwood, and Jessica Walters, and “Fatal Attraction” with Glenn Close and Michael Douglas…and I have no desire to see a bad copy, although if you’d like to see it without paying, I’ll give you a link!  Anyway, enough about the movie, let’s talk about the premeire, and that dress she wore on the red carpet.  Let’s dissect this mess, because that’s what I love to do.

It was typical Beyonce on the red carpet for her movie obsessed.  She crossed her T’s and dotted her I’s, as usual.

Dead -deer- eyes- caught- in -the- headlights expression…..CHECK!

please, won't someone help me?

please, won't someone help me?

 

Lopsided boob job……CHECK!

do plastic surgeons give refunds?

do plastic surgeons give refunds?

Trashy, ill-fitting dress made from Liberace’s window treatments…..CHECK!

Tacky Tina's been playing with the rhinestones, glue gun, an extra fabric again....

Tacky Tina's been playing with the rhinestones, glue gun, an extra fabric again....

Robotic pose  and Miss America wave …….CHECK!

sorry bey, the tinman role has already been taken

sorry bey, the tin-man role has already been taken

Plastic smile that never touches her eyes…..CHECK!

i'm not smiling, my mouth is stuck

i'm not smiling, my mouth is stuck

man, this chic knows we have the gun, yet she keeps giving us the ammunition.  On the bright side, at least she took the time to shave her armpits, and  had the decency not to show up with chipped fingernail polish.  Love you Bey!

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