It’s Curtains For Beyonce….

Well, Beyonce’s subpar thriller “Obsessed” opened to the tune of 28 1/2 milli…well at least that’s what’s being told, I really wouldn’t put it past her “machine” to inflate numbers.  Anyway, I heard that she was as corpse like as ever.  I myself have no interest in seeing it because I’ve seen “Play Misty for Me” with Clint Eastwood, and Jessica Walters, and “Fatal Attraction” with Glenn Close and Michael Douglas…and I have no desire to see a bad copy, although if you’d like to see it without paying, I’ll give you a link!  Anyway, enough about the movie, let’s talk about the premeire, and that dress she wore on the red carpet.  Let’s dissect this mess, because that’s what I love to do.

It was typical Beyonce on the red carpet for her movie obsessed.  She crossed her T’s and dotted her I’s, as usual.

Dead -deer- eyes- caught- in -the- headlights expression…..CHECK!

please, won't someone help me?

please, won't someone help me?

 

Lopsided boob job……CHECK!

do plastic surgeons give refunds?

do plastic surgeons give refunds?

Trashy, ill-fitting dress made from Liberace’s window treatments…..CHECK!

Tacky Tina's been playing with the rhinestones, glue gun, an extra fabric again....

Tacky Tina's been playing with the rhinestones, glue gun, an extra fabric again....

Robotic pose  and Miss America wave …….CHECK!

sorry bey, the tinman role has already been taken

sorry bey, the tin-man role has already been taken

Plastic smile that never touches her eyes…..CHECK!

i'm not smiling, my mouth is stuck

i'm not smiling, my mouth is stuck

man, this chic knows we have the gun, yet she keeps giving us the ammunition.  On the bright side, at least she took the time to shave her armpits, and  had the decency not to show up with chipped fingernail polish.  Love you Bey!

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14 Responses to “It’s Curtains For Beyonce….”

  1. […] Original post by dirtygurl […]

  2. LMMFAO!!! well, you’re spot on with this post!! The dress is a hot mess….I guess I’ve never really noticed that she’s had her tits done….hmmm…..

  3. dirtygurl Says:

    the train is the only issue i have with the dress, and those ruffles, it’s the fit that has me laughing. of course beyonce is just drawn to sequins like a wino to carlos rossi…..

  4. dirtygurl Says:

    and i have learned that the dress is actually a desinger dud and tina had nothing to do with it….but just because it’s designer doesn’t give it a pass, somebody didn’t want to waste a scrap of fabric!!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. loquacious Says:

    The dress is 2 sizes too small and those thunder thighs don’t help either. She was better off I saw the model who wore the dress on the runaway and it works for a skinnier model. She’s busting out of the dress like a can of bisquits. Not a cute look. And that train is ugly. On the red carpet? Who does that? This is the the Oscars.

    Still robotic poses, empty eyes, fake smiling as always. She’s nothing if not predictable.

    Like you posted DG, she knows we have the gun, so why keep giving up ammo?

  6. loquacious Says:

    I have a free link to watch and still can’t bring myself to watch it. *shuders at Beyonce’s diction.

    She wuz in yo bed? You o turched mah chiyald? You won’t cruzy, I’ll shole you cruzy.

    Nope, I can’t do it DG, not unless I have a bottle of Boonesfarm at the ready.

  7. dirtygurl Says:

    girl stop it!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    you are crazy . i just can’t do it either, although it may be good for a laugh. and skip the boones, i think i may need some mad dog 20/20 with some hennessy to stomach this mess. oh and lmao @ can of biscuits cause that’s exactly what her thighs look like two loaves of baking bread…not too dark though!, damn dress so tight it’s cutting off the circulation. if she’d have just gone up a size or two she might have been good. and i’m tired of those damn platforms shoes, she always wearing them.

  8. loquacious Says:

    LMAO @ “Dead -deer- eyes- caught- in -the- headlights expression…..CHECK!”

    Girl, I heard another line from the trailer by Beyonce, and I can’t bring myself to see it online. Have you noticed that you are punished to hear her lines over the actors like Idris & Ali themselves, the ones who actually carried the movie? Beyonce’s non acting self, smdh & WTF?

    “If yoo don’t take curr ov that wooman, ah wheel”.

    Nope, I still can’t do it. I told hubby that if you have to watch it with me because if I’m going down, you’re going with me. Love you.

    oh no you didn’t @”those thighs looking like two loaves of bread..not too light”!!! She needs to give up trying to squeeze into size 8 dresses when clearly she’s a sized 12. If you love your curves, own them in stead of faking the funk.

  9. I was non the less, very disappointed with this movie. I just wonder if she read the script first. Even the song at the end..just a little too much…Kind of seems like her mother and father made this movie so that they could feature her in yet another project. I think that now Beyonce needs to seriously pick and choose only those things she is truly good at; you know, making sure that she gets a “part” if not the lead in everything the entertainment business has to offer. Executing it is another story. There is a such thing as being “seen” too much…She is a lovely lady, but I think we need a break…

  10. SouthernBelle Says:

    Idris and Ali really made that movie and Beyonce’s performance was as the youngsters say, “AIGHT”. It wasn’t as she loves to say, “AMAZING”. LOL!
    I wish her eyes weren’t so damn dead. It’s like her mind is lost. If she could get passed that and add diction classes to it. She’d be one hell of an Actress.

  11. GOOD point…She’s doing a little too much…Most actresses pick and choose very carefully what parts they take. Not any and every part compliments every artist. Choose parts that compliment you and help you in your growth towards stardom, just make you more popular. Not all popularity is flattering.

  12. catty and cruel. Let’s see you in a bunch of photographs and see how you compare.

    • @namey~Is that a challenge? You don’t know me so how would you even know if I could compare or not? I have enough self esteem within me that I don’t have to do any of that stuff to make a point or showcase my talent. I used to model, and in good taste. I had to refuse certain gigs because of my reputation, So don’t challenge me because this is not what this site is about.

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